Dear Male Ego,

I know, I know there’s a fat chick up ahead on the climb, you can’t possibly not catch her and overtake. But if you really need to do this, please consider that said fat chick, might just be warming up, and when you hit the proverbial wall 10m in front of her, and she’s just changed up a gear, than she will well in truly spank your arse!

Also consider that this is probably your 2nd or 3rd ride this spring, whereas shes been training the entire winter through.  She is consistently training 10-15hrs a week, where as you might be lucky to be doing 5hrs at the moment. Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with that, it great in fact. But given the possibly disparity in your training regimes, there is a very high likely hood that you will be chick’d. You really need to consider this before you almost kill yourself trying to keep up.

She will just give you a friendly smile as she passes, but inwardly she is rolling on the floor  laughing. Do you think she hasn’t seen this behavior before? and she knows all the actions that are to follow? Or that passing her again in an all out effort will not just start to annoy her a little, because it means she will have to pass you again shortly.

She knows that there are male egos out there, that have accepted and quite happy for a little chat as she passes them by. So there is hope for you afterall.

Please dear ego, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being beaten by a better trained athlete, even though she does not have the advantage of testosterone like you. She knows that if you trained like her you would be kicking her ass, but she accepts, just as she accepts the bunch of males (that have been training over winter) spin past her as if the slope was nothing, while she is cranking hard on those peddles.


The tight black neoprene suit is back

The wetsuit is Back! On Monday, Emma mentioned she was going for a sea swim. The program had me to doing a 30min open water swim, but I was kinda planning to skip it, mainly because I had checked earlier in the week and the website said the sea was only 11 degrees.

If Emma was going to attempt it, I thought I had better give it a go, whats the harm? It was a really warm day down at the beach. I was the first to arrive, and started to put on the wetsuit… phew I go hot. I peeled most of it back off waiting for the crew to arrive. I had my nice warm neoprene hat, and I think it saved the day. It was a little chilly to start with, but 5min and was quite comfortable, I could have easily kept going. So it turned into a fun little trip to the beach.

The last few weeks at squad, Emma and then Karyn, decided to go slightly mad (Just in my humble opinion) and do the entire 90min squad in their wetsuits! Its become known as Wetsuits Wednesdays.

Well today I decided to drag the wetsuit out for the second time this week and join them, however I am not quite as crazy, I knew that I wasn’t going to survive in it for long. Must be that extra layer of fat I have, it saves me in the cold sea, but not the stinking hot pool.

I survived approximately 20min or about 800m. Wooo I was speedy, I was going quicker than the guys in the medium lane. You just don’t realise how much speedy they do make you. Well after that 800m, I was cooked and it was off, but Karyn and Emma continued on for the rest of the session.

Raw Food Vegan / The Chinese diet

…. Or what ever you would like to call it. The last week or so I seem to be stumbling across blogs/posts about it. I admit, I am not well read on this subject, maybe I should read further before spouting off at the mouth. One comment I read from an ultra distance runner, who is on such a diet was something like, “You can eat as much as you like and not have to worry about restricting intake”. I immediately could see his point, though I could see the issue being the opposite, getting enough energy in. Another comment was, that by eating meat (and thus the fat with it), your muscles get the marbled effect, where as those on the Raw Vegan diet have lean muscles, making them more effective. Not sure if this is at all true, sounds a little hocus pocus.

So I have had a tingling of an idea, I could try it. I don’t think I would struggle with the no meat policy that much (though Eamon might have a different opinion on that). I do love a good piece of meat and surely you don’t need to be 100% strick on that policy. Plus is there anyone more annoying to cater for, than the vegatarian(sorry vegatarians). It’s the no dairy that would get me completely stumped. My good old reliable is yoghurt, I go through 3 tubs of yoghurt a week.

I have heard all sorts of opinions about dairy, some saying that the human body was never designed for cow’s milk. But really, in a way I think that’s absolute bollocks. In my opinion, the human body has been designed for variety. Obviously, it benefits greatly by getting a substantial amount of fruit/veg/nut etc, but it has evolved for variety. Take the common pig, a omnivore like us, will mainly graze on vegetable matter, but they’ll happily eat the odd animal.

So, maybe I am over doing the diary in my “variety”. The other arguments, is obviously environmental, how to feed a world population eating up the food chain, rather than down. I know the logic and reasoning, but doesn’t really move me. Maybe, because in NZ meat and dairy is well resourced, though I hate what diary is doing to the water systems in Canterbury and Mckenzie Country, but that is commerce and export, not locally brought products. I moved to free range pork only, a few months ago, I am not as vigilant on this with my chickens as I think I should be.

So anyway, I have come to the conclusion:

  • The principal of what I will call “vegetation grazing” I like, try to eat as majority and as close to “raw” as possible.
  • Keep the variety in the diet, maybe substitute the yoghurt snack for something else occasionally
  • Need to stop the damn diet Soda’s (V especially), as off next week I am going to try to stop all together. (I actully came to this conclusion a while ago and really has nothing to do with the said topic)

Does anyone have any experience with this type of diet?

Fried Legs Recipe


  • 1 Crazy Human
  • 1 Bike
  • 1 Pair of
  • Not enough  Nutrition
  • Heaps of Hills
  • Tons of Strong Hot NW headwinds


The day before, human is to do a 20K hilly run.


Combine human, bike and hills with a splattering of NW wind  for about 3.5 hours. Human should forget to drink on the hills. This may mean stopping at diary and getting Jelly beans, the minimal nutrition should be weighed against getting the human (and thus legs) back to start location. At the 3.5 hr mark remove the hills, and get the NW headwind blowing.

Get back to start location after about 5hrs, and replace bike with running shoes. Get human to run the first K a little too fast, this will cause them to struggle to keep pace at 2K and slow right down to finish. This slow down is what you are looking for, it indicates that the legs are well and truly fried.

A upsy downsy week

Early on this week I managed a PB on my run to the kiwi. I didn’t just break it I tromped on it. My Previous best was 46:30. My program told me to do a PB on the run so I was aiming for 45min, but smashed that as well. I got to the kiwi in 42:16. Totally and absolutely stoke with that, especially at the start of the year, I was just happy when I went under 50min. I can’t belive how well I have been running these last couple of weeks, Lets hope it continues.Next time, lets see if I can break 40min 😉

So the start of the week was good, but last night bought things down a notch or two. It was my monthly trundle off to the nutritionist, including the dreaded weigh in. The good news, she’s put back in that extra snack that she took out last time. Mainly because I am not disciplined to stay away from bad stuff when I get hungry. But the Bad news, my weight is exactly (to the gram) the same as 4 weeks ago. That is just frustrating, so a few tweaks to the plan, a few suggestions to get past problems I have been having. Looks like I am going to become an awesome baker, and the fridge will become packed with baked goods.

Got a hard weekend coming up, long run on Saturday and big ride on Sunday (supposed to be short bays then long bays, but I might need to get inventive if Evans is still closed).

Also, this week I realised that SI half is only 6 weeks away. Thats come around quick, so decided yesterday to enter it. So all the main three events for this summer are entered and I’m ready to go.

Getting to Kona

“OMG, shes gone crazy”… Maybe I should shut up now. I see people sitting down at their computers rolling their eyes at me…. OK, before you all think she’s gone a little bit nuts, let me explain.

Uhhh, nope I can’t really explain, I am slightly nuts, but here’s my thought patterns. It’s Kona Week, well Kona has just gone week. It looks awesome, and your brain does do that funny little thought, “Maybe I can get there”. Now it is  a really really really tiny thought, often followed by “yeah right”. But the tiny little seed of a thought, finds fertile ground in some particular part of the brain and begins to grow.

So you start to think, “How can you get there?”

The first option is obvious, you qualify. So what do you need to do to Qualify? Well you go to the Ironman NZ website and see what times were for my Age Groupers. So turns out a time of around 10:30 will get you qualified. Hmmm, I either need to run a 3:30 marathon, or bike a 5:30 and still be able to run a 4hr Marathon (yes I did sit down and do the calculations, the 10:30 in big bold letters was obviously not a big enough deterrent for me). Lets see, whats the likely hood of that happening? I am going to say 1 in 100 chance.

Now, I know what you are thinking, “Don’t be so negative on yourself, if you belive you can, you can”. But at some point you do just have to take a realistic look at yourself. Ok, so first option, is not really an option. Or at least not untill I am at least 40, then I might be in with a shot.

So 2nd option, the lottery. Some people violently object to it. I’m a bit oh hum on the idea, but researched it anyway. There was a nice little link on the Ironman page  to register for the lottery. “Sweet” I thought “let’s do it, what have I go to loose?”. $US40  apparently. Well crap for that, I not paying for no guarantee.

There’s a 3rd option, the disabled lottery. As I am not disabled and have no intention of becoming so, and faking would just be incredibly morally wrong. It’s not actually an option.

So that just leaves me no where. Looks like I will not be getting to Kona anytime in the near future. Yes, this was a rather pointless excercise in going nowhere on a subject.

Have I grown up, or just become a boring Nana?

Before I begin, congrats to the NZ athletes at Kona today, it doesn’t look like any of the NZ pros had a good day. It is not a easy race that’s for sure. But congrats to Macca, surprisingly for a Austalian, I was hoping he would win it again. I think Macca is great, he just seems to love what he does so much. Watching the last few K’s on that run was great, you would have throught Ralert would have just run right past, but Macca somehow got the edge.

I do have a new run mentor to visualise when out there running, Miranda Carfrae is pretty damn awesome.

My normal routine on Sunday night is to finish filling in my training diary for the week, and review the plan for next week, before sending of to Jo with any questions about the week to come. Tonight I made a discovery, I am supposed to be doing Frostbuster next weekend. My only response to that was “Oh crap, I can’t be assed”. Now a few years ago, I would have been revving to go. I had an event lined up almost every 2nd weekend at some stages. I wanted to do everything.

But not any more, if it was free, 10min down the road, and didn’t require a support crew to organise people to do it, I might feel inclined. But it isn’t and rather save the entry fee for some new toy. So the question has to be, have I grown up? Now that I have gotten over that incessant need to do every race. Or have I just become a boring Nana? That can not be bothered getting of her ass to do something fun. I would much rather do a training ride or run.

Well, anyway I told Jo I don’t want to do it in the email. Hopefully, she doesn’t come back and strongly recommend I get of my Nana ass and do it.